When You Are Feeling Judged
WHEN YOU ARE FEELING JUDGED
Some time back I had an amazing weekend in NYC with my fiancé and our son. We were in town to see our favorite band, Phish, and we had an ah-mazing time!
Soooo many breakthroughs!
One of these breakthroughs was around being true to yourself – even when you are afraid of being judged… in order to stay on purpose.
For my man and I, live Phish shows are like going to church. Every show I see, I experience some level of healing and open up to a heightened awareness of self and soul purpose. Their music was also the catalyst that helped me to wake up and get present, which led me to radical healing and beginning to live on purpose. Like I said – it’s my church!
I should also add that the band Phish has a reputation of having a party scene. I know this because I used to contribute to that scene before my awakening.
Now my point in sharing that is because we brought along our 4 month old son, Oliver. As a parent, everyone seems to have an opinion, but I wasn’t going to let that stop me. I know my child, I know myself, I know the scene and I know the venue. We also have a great pair of baby earmuffs and I’d be carrying him on my chest the whole time in my Ergo Carrier. At the end of the day, my babe is always safest with his mama and papa.
And yet…. I had an intense moment where I really questioned myself.
Should I have left him with my mom? Am I a bad parent?
What will people think of me?
I made the decision that bringing Oliver with us was right for our family.
And while nothing happened at the shows to cause me to change my mind, I caught myself getting sucked into a thought pattern of not trusting myself and feeling like I was a horrible parent.
This called me to attention.
I stopped. I checked on Oli, he was fine. I looked around, nothing had changed, everything was fine. And it was in that moment that I realized I was wasting my precious energy listening to the fears of my ego instead of the truth inside of my heart.
So I had to ask myself: “Is this true?”
Am I bad mother? Absolutely not!!! My son was sleeping soundly, cozied up on my chest, healthy as can be, surrounded by likeminded people, joyfully experiencing music that heals the soul.
Are people judging me? No – and if they are – who cares?! I know I’m a good mama and if I felt uncomfortable at any point, I’d be out of there in a flash.
My purpose in that moment was to be present
with the experience, to dance and to have an amazing time so that I could have the breakthroughs my soul was yearning for.
I share this story with you for a couple of reasons:
- If you are ever feeling judged by others, check in with yourself. You are the only person who can make you feel any sort of way. Be confident in your decisions and the rest can fall away
- When you get caught up afraid of what others might be thinking of you, you lose touch with YOUR truth and fall off purpose. If I had listened to the fear, I might have gotten up and left, missing out on all the powerful downloads and breakthroughs that come through for me at Phish shows!
At the end of the day, you have to be true to you. Don’t allow the thoughts, fears or emotions of others take you off purpose. You have no one to answer to except yourself. You choose how you want to feel in any moment, so choose wisely!
If this story speaks to you – if you’ve been there (or are there now) and want to cultivate the inner power + confidence to radically shift your perspective in a moment, to move out of resistance and into purpose, I’d love for you to come on over and join me and well over 3,000 sisters in the Feminine Purpose Sisterhood where I provide daily support and inspiration to live into your most purposeful and most empowered self.
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